Ode to my Beloved Dad 3

 Someone once told me that grief was in stages. I couldn't quite relate until we lost Ekemini Aviomoh. Years later, it was Ken Whitey Ochei (the funkiest albino ever). Then, the world stopped on October 7 2016 when we lost you. For weeks, I was in denial. Several questions thronged my mind: How could you GO, just like that? Not even a word, no goodbyes. I beseeched God to bring you back and called all my charismatic friends to no avail. Alas, IT WAS OVER, and YOUR RACE HAD BEEN RUN.

Nobody would ever call me 'ALAO' again. This harsh realization keeps hitting home. It's been 7 years, yet the pain persists. I see you in my triumphs and travails. Whenever I behold my boys, I see your face, your smiles, and your mannerisms. Blood is indeed thick. I always have to console myself thus: 'Courage brother, do not stumble, though thy path be dark as night. There's a star to guide the humble. Trust in God, and do the right.

A father's love for his children, though not always expressed is indescribable. The daily sacrifices, those years when you couldn't get yourself new suits while we were well-kitted and never lacked. You drove a simple car, but we were always driven to and from school, away from the rain and sun. You were so proud of us, especially when we came tops in class. I vividly recall one term when 4 of us came 1st, and you photocopied the results for keeps at your office. Your strength and fervor were AWESOME.

We were mostly on different sides in sports, policies, and a whole lot. You supported Manchester United, I loathed them. In 2015, you were pro-GEJ, I was undecided. You loved and lived life to the fullest, and spent quality time in the service of God and humanity. You were a great competitor and transferred your zeal to CMO Zone F who became serial winners in the Father's day contests while you led them. As a firm believer in the COMMON GOOD, you gave yourself freely to causes. You ably represented Aguluezechukwu in the Old Aguata forum, and Anambra State Towns & People's Association. You were a great leader of men, an organizer, and a strategist.

On the day you left us, a huge chunk of my heart went with you. I had to lock my heart at some point, just to cope with the pain. For 5 years, I was your chef, you were my flatmate, confidante, and best friend. All the job offers from Lagos were turned down to stay close to you. The monthly trips from Makurdi (to prepare soups and stew) while serving felt like a waste. I miss our road trips from Abuja to Anambra and Akwa Ibom (buying onions at Giri junction and bananas at Obollo were a constant on those trips). I miss the shouts of 'DINHO' whenever Ronaldinho Gaucho had the ball. If tears could bring you back, I will gladly cry you a river.

My Big Fish, this is a concession letter. my acceptance of the fact that you are gone. It's taken 7 years. I believe God is in control but it still hurts. I couldn't have wished for a better dad. You were the best there was, is, and ever would be. I would resume my language classes today in your honor.

Adios amigos, adieu mon pere, arriverderci, a plus tard, bis spater. I LOVE YOU, BIG FISH 'DOUGLAS' T.O.C Elias-Onunkwo, Shield of the masses. Keep smiling down on us from heaven, and may your gentle soul keep resting in the bosom of our Lord, Jesus. May our lady, Queen of our family, and Queen of our hearts keep interceding for us.

'Precious in the eyes of the Lord is the death of his Saints'.

Your son,

'Mario' St Val Okey Osita-Onunkwo

ODE TO MY BELOVED DADDY 2 - THE LAST TIME I SAW YOU

'The good deeds of a righteous man always yield bountiful harvests for his descendants'. No good deed ever goes to waste. In the right time and season, the harvest surely comes'.

Valentine ONUNKWO (2019).

My Big Fish, it's been three long and eventful years since you bade this sinful earth goodbye and assumed your position in the committee of 'the Church triumphant' in heaven. Like the General you were, you excelled on all fronts, conquered territories and defended your family till your last breath. Among all fathers in the world, NONE could compare to you. You were a SPARKLING DIAMOND in the midst of THORNS, A PRICELESS GEM.

Living with you for the last 5 years of your life prepared me to face the raging storms of life with strength, tolerance, absolute confidence in God and proactively. You were never one to condone indiscipline or to pamper anyone beyond reasonable levels. From an early age, we all learnt to be responsible for our actions and that we wouldn't get everything we desired. Your famous line was 'work hard and get it for yourself.' That was a huge filip for me to keep striving towards self reliance.

That earth shattering infamous call on the 7th October, 2016 still resonates in my head. In a flash that day, it dawned on me that I had become a husband (to mum) and a father to my younger ones. Nothing prepared me for the turmoil and the difficult decisions to be taken almost immediately. When I am at the crossroads now, after invoking my counselor, the HOLY GHOST, I sometimes subconsciously take the course of action you would have taken if you were there. Your broad assessment of events, interpretation of situations and swift decision making was LEGENDARY. This approach has bailed me out of several challenges.

You left us in the hands of the ALMIGHTY FATHER. YOUR LAST WORDS - LET GOD TAKE CONTROL was PRICELESS. These 3 years have revealed that we now have a guardian angel and the ALMIGHTY GOD is INDEED IN CONTROL.

THE LAST TIME I SAW YOU, I was a young man struggling to find his feet. Today, I am a man, a PROUD HUSBAND and FATHER. By the way, my baby looks so much like you.

Adversity, occasioned by your sudden demise has made us stronger and a formidable unit. You are FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS. Keep watching over us from your Station in heaven.



Sleep on My Big Fish, 'Douglas' Theophilus Osita Chuma Elias-Onunkwo,  Shield of the Masses.

Te amo. Arrivederci.


Your Boy,
Valentine Okey Osita-Onunkwo

ODE TO MY BELOVED DADDY, THE BIG FISH

'To live is to die and to die is to live forever in the hearts of your loved ones'. (ValMario, 2017)

My Big Fish, it's been one long year without you. How time flies..... You were supposed to meet my beautiful future wife and my lovely unborn kids but death played a fast one on us. You left without saying goodbye. You promised you'll be back before travelling. If ONLY one could see the future......if only I knew I would never see your smiling face again...................................................

MY BRAVE COMMANDING OFFICER
VETERAN OF LIFE'S BATTLES
BASTION OF INTEGRITY AND EXCELLENCE
BANKING COLLOSUS
PARAGON OF VIRTUE
PRICELESS GEM
ORGANIZER IN CHIEF
LEADER OF MEN
MAN OF THE PEOPLE
LOYAL FRIEND
INCORRUPTIBLE ROLE MODEL AND MENTOR


You bestrode the earth like the god you were, fearless and dogged in all your pursuits. You were a survivor. From a dog bite as a little boy, to 8 gunshots in the line of duty (for refusing to cover up a fraud), to numerous car crashes (including the 1996 sommersault), you survived it all. When God felt the world had become too evil for one of his bravest warriors, he called you home to prevent contamination.

REWIND...... That earth shattering call by 3:45am, 7th October, 2016, 'Okey, hold yourself, your daddy has stopped breathing.' It sounded like a rude joke at first but as the clock ticked and the seconds passed, it became evident that 'my best flatmate ever' had gone to be with the Lord and wasn't coming back. THE ONLY BIG FISH had to bow to the KING OF KINGS. My world went blank, I was numb for hours. I just couldn't fathom how you could go without telling YOUR BOY goodbye. Life has been a wild ride since then but I'm comforted  by the fact that you lived a good life, touched many hearts and are smiling down on us from the bosom of our Lord, Jesus. We are coping well. The void is large but God has filled it.

While the earth mourned your departure, the heavens rejoiced at your grand entry. You left peacefully and asked God to TAKE CONTROL. That Divine control and peace permeates every aspect of our lives. IN MY HEART, YOU ARE IMMORTAL. We miss your profound humility, unassuming nature, welcoming demeanor and wide array of friends (including the lowly and children). You were generous to a fault and had a great dedication to God. Jealously watch over your station (US) from the bosom of Christ.

One memory is evergreen in my head. During my job hunt travails, after being bounced by some multinationals due to the renowned 9JA FACTOR, I asked you why A NATIONAL JETS Bronze medalist and an Academic Champion of Akwa Ibom (LEMME BLOW MY TRUMPET A BIT) should struggle to get decent jobs. Your response was legendary -You are one of the best untainted brains left in Nigeria. Focus on excellence, when it's your time, your brilliance will pave the way for you. Coming from a retired Human Resource man, that was a huge inspiration. I miss our Sports, Policy, Religious and Politics discussions. You raised me to be a Brave Soldier amid Life's battles and that has helped me adapt. Even in death, you are still my WINGMAN. I couldn't have asked for a better dad. I feel blessed to have been your flatmate for your last five years. WE MISS YOU

TILL WE MEET AGAIN, ADIEU MON PERE, MON AMI, ADIOS AMIGO, SANGASUNG ETI UFAN MMI, ETE MMI, JE OFUMA NNAM, ENYIM OMA. KEEP SOARING WITH THE ANGELS, MY BIG FISH 'DOUGLAS' Theophilus Osita Chuma (TOC) ELIAS-ONUNKWO, SHIELD OF THE MASSES. TE AMO. ARRIVEDERCI.

'Good men don't really die, they merely transit from mortality to immortality and their legacies endure forever'. (ValMario, 2017). You left an indelible print on the sands of time. YOU ARE IRREPLACEABLE.



Your Son,
Valentine Okey 'MARIO-ASSOMPTO' Osita-Onunkwo

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